Brian Chilson/Styling by Mandy Keener
Meat Man

When decorating for your Halloween party, you could set out some cheese and crackers for people to snack on, maybe some cute finger sandwiches. No one would complain. But it’s Halloween, so why don’t you take some of that prosciutto, slap it on a cheap plastic skeleton head and blow your guests’ minds with a cold cut meat man? What are you doing, don’t put your smoked BBQ weenies in a bowl! String them together with floss or jewelry wire and give your skeleton some good old-fashioned guts. The ends of sausages make great lungs and kidneys. Don’t forget a bologna stomach. What’s Halloween without a skeleton chock-full of all your favorite preservatives?

Also, it’s great that you made Rice Krispy Treats, but you totally blew it by not adding a scoop of red velvet cake mix and red food coloring to turn them into crispy meat patty hearts. Try again.